


Sunrise

by sonictrowel



Series: Long Night in the Blue House [66]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005), Doctor Who (Big Finish Audio)
Genre: F/M, Family Feels, Heavy Angst, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-11
Updated: 2017-07-11
Packaged: 2018-11-30 23:36:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11474028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sonictrowel/pseuds/sonictrowel
Summary: They didn’t sleep.  There were six hours til dawn, and not a minute to be wasted.





	Sunrise

**Author's Note:**

> This is it, guys, the last chapter on Darillium. The angst is unavoidable, but I hope it doesn't disappoint.

[Darillium]

They didn’t sleep.  There were six hours til dawn, and not a minute to be wasted.  They made love until they were both utterly spent, reaching for each other again the moment they’d finally collapsed back onto the mattress.  River’s legs were jelly and her hands were shaking as she placed them on either side of his face.  The Doctor held her close despite their sweaty skin and kissed her even as they struggled to catch their breath.

She brushed back a few rogue wisps of silver hair, darkened with perspiration, that had stuck to his forehead.  Every cell in her body was singing with satisfaction and mad, frenzied love and utter exhaustion, but there was no rest to be had for them now.  Still, she could have a few more moments of this.  Of the Doctor stroking her hair, his soft eyes staring into hers, their gaze broken only for gentle, lingering kisses, as three hearts thundered between them in defiance of the sudden calm.

They’d said everything there was to be said a hundred times by now, and the rest was simply known; felt at once in their shared minds.  All there was left to do, in the very last hours, was hold on tight.

But time passes, even for Time Lords and children of TARDISes.

River felt the gravity of every move she made, the crushing weight settling over her.  Her feet swinging down from their bed to the floor, for the last time.  Standing, dressing, walking out of the room together, as entangled as they could be without tripping over their feet: all lasts, now.

Outside of the sanctuary of their bedroom, everything felt a bit unreal.  They met Nardole in the kitchen.  The sunlamps glared in River’s eyes, already burning with tears and sleep deprivation.  They spoke with Nardole briefly, but the pulsing roar of blood rushing through her veins drowned out everything.  The Doctor sat her down at the worktop and kissed her, and for a moment there was clarity and colour and sound and all of it was saying _this is right; don’t let it go._

Then their lips parted and he walked over to the cooker and her ears were ringing again, the too-yellow light making her feel sick.

Before she knew it, lost in the tangle of her fuzzy thoughts, there was a steaming teacup placed in front of her.  She looked up at the Doctor’s sad, loving, reassuring smile.

“Nothing that isn’t helped just a little bit by a cuppa, sweetheart,” he said.

The last cup of tea he’d make for her.  She reached for it carefully, not trusting her trembling hands.

They went to Athena’s room next, not bothering to wake her fully as she tried to doze through being changed out of her pyjamas and bodily handled into some proper clothes.  She was a bit old for that, but she was so tired, and she had such a hard day ahead.

The Doctor gathered her in his arms and she tucked her sleepy face into his shoulder.  River tried to memorise every tiny detail of that precious image.

They went with Nardole to the control room.  Once the lever was raised, they wouldn’t have long.

“Ready?” the Doctor asked Nardole.  He nodded as he shouldered the bag of their essentials and the little knapsack they’d packed for Athena with her precious mementos.

“Ready, dear?” he asked, meeting River’s eyes as he carefully shifted Athena into her arms.

“Never,” she said softly, tightening her grip on Athena and smiling at him as her vision blurred with tears.

The Doctor ducked under the console and threw the siege mode switch.  The time rotor hummed to life again, the dim lights around the control room rising.

Together, they walked back into the house.  Through the windows, the sky was aglow with a pale blue predawn light.  It wouldn’t be long now until the sun would break over the horizon, and their twenty-four years would finally be at an end.

They opened the front door, having their first look in several weeks at the architectural chimera they’d built in the front garden.  It had started to erode in the wind, the finer bits slowly disappearing.  Soon the sun would melt it away.

River squeezed Athena tight as she stepped outside, the last gasps of Darillium’s long night of winter buffeting her hair and stinging her cheeks.  The Doctor wrapped his arms around them both, resting his head against hers.  The towers were singing, the bittersweet song ringing out through the still blue world.

She didn’t want to be the first to move; to suggest it was time.  But the Doctor had been so strong, she had to do her part.  And once the sun had risen, Gallifrey could be coming for Athena at any time.  They couldn’t wait.

River hesitantly opened her mouth to speak, but before any sound could come out, there was a crackling _zap_ in the air, a waft of smoke and the scent of ozone.

“Milly?” she gasped, frozen for a moment in shock at the apparition before her in the blue haze.

The spell of quiet stillness over the world suddenly broken, everyone started shouting at once.

“What the hell are you doing here?” the Doctor cried, confusion and joy and pain in his voice.  River didn’t catch what Nardole had shouted, but he was the first to muster his wits to move toward Milly and wrap her in a hug, which she returned with a laugh.

“Oh, you know,” she said, smiling shyly and glancing from the Doctor to River as she spoke.  “Thought I’d just pop by and say hello.”

Their Amelia.  River hadn’t seen her since she found out, and now, at the last moment, she was here—  She wasn’t sure who moved, but suddenly tears were streaming down her face and for the first time, both of her daughters were in her arms.

It was at this point, somewhat smushed between them, that Athena woke up completely.  

“Mummy?” she said groggily.  “Is it time to go?”

“I’m afraid so, kid,” Milly said.  “You’re with me.”

 _“What?”_  River, the Doctor and Nardole said in concert.  

“They’re after me too.  And going cross-country’s dangerous.  I’ve got a better way in, where they’ll never catch us en route.”

“Oh, and what’s that?” the Doctor asked, running a hand through his hair and looking nearly as disorientated as River felt.

“Your TARDIS.”

“Mils, we can’t go into New York, it’s—”

“Oh, you don’t have to,” she said.  “You already did.”

The wind whistled past as they gaped at her.

“Y-you were there?!” he finally sputtered.

“I mean, I haven’t done it yet, but I’m about to, so, yeah?”

“I— you— wha—” the Doctor had both hands in his hair now, and left it an absurd mess as he withdrew them and spun to face the TARDIS.  “You didn’t ever feel like mentioning that, huh?!”

“The more we loop back on each other’s timelines, the tougher we are to find, and the harder it would be for them to take a shot at us without mucking up the whole web of time thing.”

“That’s… true,” River said, trying to sort her thoroughly overwhelmed brain.

“No one can travel directly in anymore, so you just hitch onto the last ride that already did?”  Nardole said.  “Well... yeah, that’d work.  Clever, actually.”

“Everyone got to know Gran and Grandad except for me.  I’m sort of excited,” Milly said, with an apologetic smile.  “But I know it’s… not a good day for all of you.”

“You’re here, though,” River said, smiling.  “You’re here and that means someday it’ll all be alright.”

“Mummy,” Athena asked, “who is she?”

The Doctor slid his arm around River’s back.  “Athena,” he said, “this is your sister, Amelia.”

“But you might as well call me Milly, everyone else does now.”

Athena was quiet for a moment.  “I’ve seen your picture,” she said.  “It’s on the mantel.”

Milly’s face twitched as she failed to stifle a pleased grin, glancing between River and the Doctor.  “I’ve… seen you before, too, let’s just say.  But it’s lovely to meet you properly, Athena.  You ready to take a little road trip?”

“To see Gran and Grandad, so we’ll be safe from the bloody Time Lords?”

River laughed through her tears along with Milly while the Doctor mumbled something and scratched the back of his head.

“Yep,” Milly said.  "Exciting, right?”

River bit her lip, feeling so grateful for this little bit of grace in the last moment.  At least their girls would be together.

“Oh, no,” Nardole said, softly.

River watched his face, staring behind her with sad resignation.  She took a deep breath and turned around.

Off to the left of the house the first rays of light were slanting through the clouds, the very top of the dim red orb of the sun cresting over the snow-coated horizon.  Her heart leapt into her throat.

“This is it, I’m afraid,” Milly said.

All of their planning couldn’t prepare her for the panic sweeping through her.  She looked to the Doctor, his face contorted with the effort of suppressing tears, just as it had been on their first night on Darillium.  

“Oh, Mum— this is yours,” Milly said, reaching into her jacket pocket and producing another Vortex manipulator.

“Oh,” River said faintly as she shifted Athena to her hip and took it, gripping the leather band tightly in her hand.  “Thank you.”  She sniffed.  “Uh, Nardole, the bags—”

“Right,” he said, and River took the knapsack from him and pressed it into Milly’s arms.

“You’d better take this too,” the Doctor said, producing a little square casing with a flashing purple light and looping wires protruding all around from his pocket: the chronon inhibitor/perception filter gadget he’d tinkered with.  “Little extra insurance that they won’t be able to follow your trail through the Vortex.”

Milly tucked it into her jacket.  “Sorry for taking your job, Nardole,” she said.

“Oh, that’s alright.  I have my marching orders,” he replied with a wink.  “I’d better get in and take a look at the monitors in the control room, see if there's any sign of our guests.”  

“Right,” the Doctor mumbled.  “Good idea.”

Nardole hesitated for a moment, then hugged Milly again before turning to Athena, still clutched in River’s arms.

“You have fun getting spoilt by your grandparents, alright?” he said cheerily.  “I hear that’s one of the main highlights of childhood.  Never had one myself, so you enjoy it for me.”

Athena nodded her head as she wiped her eyes.

“Dr. Song— in case I don’t…”

River glanced at the Vortex manipulator being crushed in her hand.  “Oh, right.  I suppose I’ll have to be on my way as well.”  She forced a smile.  

“I don’t quite know what to say.”

“Neither do I,” she said.  “Thank you for everything, Nardole.”

“It’s been an honour, ma’am.”  He tilted his head forward faintly and with a last smile, retreated into the TARDIS.

“Right,” the Doctor said, and grinned down at Athena.  It was almost convincing.  He pulled River and Athena into his arms.  “You be a good girl for the Ponds, kitten,” he said, voice deep and scratchy.  “They’re going to love you.”

“And we love you, so much,” River whispered, bending to kiss her head.

With all of the willpower she possessed, she passed Athena over to Milly.

“Milly,” she said, turning her blurry gaze on her younger, currently older daughter, "I—”

“I know,” Milly said, smiling.  “Love you, Mum.  Dad.”  She dialed in the coordinates on her manipulator.  “Ready?” she asked.

Athena nodded firmly.  Her beautiful little girl.  Brave, even when she was crying.

And then, in an instant, they were gone.

The Doctor was holding River before she could think or stumble or sob.  “Hey,” he whispered in her ear, “it’ll be alright.”

She clung to him like the only still thing in a world spinning out of control.  “Promise?”

“Promise.”

His hands rose from her back to cup her face and he kissed her, desperate and passionate and deep.

“Doctor!” Nardole called from the front door.  “We’ve got incoming!”

Letting his mouth part from hers was agony.

“What will you do?”

“Tell them to fuck off,” he answered easily.  “They’re already too late.  It’ll be okay.”

“I love you,” River whispered, swallowing down a sob.

“I love you, and don’t you dare forget it.”

She let out a weak breath of laughter, smiling even as her tears spilled over again.  “I won’t.”

With shaking hands, she fumbled between them to strap on the Vortex manipulator and punch in the coordinates.

The Doctor kissed her again, his mouth almost bruising against hers.  When he opened his eyes they were full of tears and so, so much love.

“Well,” he said finally, “I’ll see you around, sweetheart.”

River beamed at him.  “I’ll wait up for you, darling.”

Before she could let herself think for another moment, she pressed the button.

 

___

 

Travelling via Vortex manipulator was definitely something one could become unaccustomed to after a long interval.

The ground lurched beneath her, everything was a nauseating blur, and before she knew which way was up, she was on her hands and knees in her front garden on Luna, trying not to be sick into the grass.  Finally, her shoulders began to shake as the sobs she’d been choking down rose into her throat.

Then her ears prickled, and she turned her burning eyes toward her block.  Her flat was the ground floor, and someone was inside.

Swallowing down her sorrow again, River got to her feet and drew her blaster from its holster, silently approaching the front door, staying out of view of the windows.

As she entered the lobby, she finally recognised the sound emanating from the front door of her flat.

Vivaldi’s _Winter._

Her breath caught in her throat.  It couldn’t be.  He couldn’t be here.  

She had to die first.  She had to die, and then wait for him, and if after all of that he was just here in her bloody flat making a pot of tea she was going to _kill him._ _Again._  Maybe he’d like to actually learn the meaning of being snogged to death; the last time was hardly worthy of the descriptor.

Trying not to let her thoughts race on too far ahead, lest there be actual danger, she silently opened the door and slipped inside, creeping along the wall with practised grace.

It wasn’t guitar, it was just a record of the actual piece playing.  Could be a coincidence.  A real intruder, albeit one with all the subtlety of a royal parade.

There was movement in the kitchen.  She crossed the lounge and pressed her back to the outside wall of the kitchen before stepping slowly around the doorframe, blaster drawn.

Someone was rummaging through her cupboards, humming to himself along with the music, and there was a kettle on the hob just starting to boil. Oh, for god’s sake, it couldn’t be—

As the whistle built up in volume, he turned and startled at the sight of her.

“Oh, hello!” he said in a deep, dulcet, obliviously cheerful voice.  “Is this your flat?  The gun’s really quite unnecessary, I’m only making tea.”

The kettle continued to screech as River stared at him, too shocked to move.

“What the hell are you doing here!?” she finally sputtered.

“Well, I believe I was invited.  Sorry for letting myself in, but there was no one at home, and normally I don’t have much trouble with locks but yours were _quite_ interesting, actually!  And— you really _can_ put the gun down.”

River blinked, just actually remembering she was holding it.  She lowered her blaster and slipped it into her holster, letting out a breath and dropping her head into her hand.  She was not in _any_ mental state to deal with this.

The Doctor switched off the hob.  “Darjeeling alright?” he asked, as if this were a perfectly normal thing to be doing.

“That's fine, sweetie,” she sighed, collapsing into a chair at the kitchen table.

He hesitated as he loaded the teapot, peering curiously at her.  “Do I… know you?”

River smiled ruefully.  The question shouldn't hurt; he was so very young.  Nevertheless.

“It's just… I don't mean to be rude, but I've an embarrassing condition this lifetime.  Sometimes my memory feels a bit like Swiss cheese.  But you seem… familiar.”

“You always say that,” she replied, trying to force her voice to be light.

“Oh.  That bad, is it?” He winced apologetically.

River studied him.  By the lines on his face and the short-cropped curls, he wasn't new to this body, but the clothes...  “You've gone back to the velvet, I see?”

“Oh, um, yes.”  He flashed her that easy smile.  

“Always loved you in velvet,” she said under her breath.  A lump formed in her throat and she blinked back tears, staring down at the table.

The Doctor sat down across from her with the tea tray.  “Well, you might know me, but you don’t seem terribly happy to see me.  Are you alright?”

“I’m always happy to see you, Doctor,” she said, smiling even though she could actually hardly see him through the tears filling her eyes.  “I’ve just had a... day.”

“Any time you’d like to tell me, then,” he said gently, placing his hand over hers.

Oh, he was definitely remembering some things.  Even if he didn’t know it.  Did she have to _immediately_ be plunged into this temptation?

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea,” she said carefully.  It never was.

“Good ideas— I have those occasionally.  They’re boring.”

God, she loved him.  “Do you flirt like this with all the girls whose flats you break into?”

He let out an embarrassed laugh that was so charming it was unfair.  “Flirt?  I’m not flirting.  …Am I?”

River turned her hand over and clasped his.  “Well, let’s find out.”

“I should probably, uh, pour the tea before it gets too strong.”

“You could do that.  Or you could let me do something very, very stupid,” she said.  “Curious?”

The Doctor swallowed.  “It is a weakness of mine.”

Ignoring every voice in her head that told her this was trouble, she reached across the table and brushed her hand over his cheek before laying it against the side of his face, fingertips at his temple.  She’d told him who she was before, plenty of times.  Sometimes he even remembered the previous bits when she did.  Now she knew how to take the shortcut.  She’d just have to make sure he forgot it later.

After today, she was going to take whatever gifts the universe offered her.

His eyes grew wide as all the locks around her in his mind clicked open.

“River?” he asked breathlessly.

She beamed at him.  “Hello, sweetie.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> How long have I been waiting to bring in the Eighth Doctor? SO LONG!!! 
> 
> Had to end it on a less depressing note!
> 
> And now, after the writing marathon I've done to get to him, I am taking a nap. ;)


End file.
